So, for my 80th birthday I am treating myself to a Rick Steves tour of Italy with a hop over to Greece to see my youngest grandson.
I AM GOING on a trip Sept. 2, one day after I turn 80 years old.
It’s a Rick Steves tour that starts in Venice, goes to Florence and then Rome. From Rome I will hop over to Athens to see my youngest grandson who is going to the American College of Greece.
This is a trip Connie and I were going to take, but then as we approached our departure date there was no more denying that dementia was making march on her brain and so we cancelled.
Since she died April 20, I’ve spent some time wondering if I could take trips we were going to take together. Venice and Rome are, after all, romantic destinations and how much would I enjoy them without her to share observations and hugs with? I finally decided that I would go. I am, at my core, a nomad. I like to wander and see. So, that is what I am going to do.
Getting ready for the trip has made me think back over the kind of traveler I am. I am not a “group” traveler. When my Dad retired from teaching and acting he began leading bus tours of Europe. In 1992 my wife, son and I went on one of the to England and Scotland. It was fun but as a travel concept, it’s not something I’ve wanted to repeat. Too many people, too many stops that had commercialism tied in.
My travel, both in this country and abroad, has been done by wandering on my own. In Europe I have used mass transit and a couple of times rented a car. Same in Australia and New Zealand. But, if you don’t want to use a rent car, once you get out of the US public transportation ranges from pretty good to outstanding.
Now that I am 80 I am becoming a bit more cautious when it comes to rent cars. I am fine driving on the “wrong side” of the road but being responsible for a car not mine, particularly overseas, is not that appealing.
SO, I AM taking a tour, but Rick Steves tours are not like most other tours. You are in a small group – roughly 15-20 people. You go from town to town in small buses. You stay in small hotels off the beaten path. You carry your own bags and you do a lot of walking. Because these are small groups you go to places big groups don’t go to. You see the things that are downside streets, in smaller museums.
Then there is Rick Steves and his values. The man pays an annual carbon fee, voluntarily, to offset all the folks who are getting on planes to take his tours. His trips include stops that will challenge your social conscience and change your perspective. In other words, Rick Steves shares my values and if I can spend my travel dollars with someone like that, I’m going to. I’ve also spent years using his guidebooks and watching his show on PBS so I feel like I know him, and trust him.
I also like his smaller footprint approach because it’s my feeling that “big” is destroying the things we travel to see. Cruise ships have jammed up harbors and flooded streets, adding to pollution. Good for local business? I suppose but in some locations the “mom and pop” shops have been forced out, bought out by the big corporate entities. So, I will take small.
I don’t know that I will always take a tour, even a Rick Steves tour. I can be a bit of a loner and that solitary wanderlust remains pretty strong. And like I said, you can get around Europe without a car or tour. In the past I’ve taken trains, trolleys, trams, cabs and Uber. That holds even today in my “old fart” stage.
Another reason to avoid cars and just wander using what modes of transportation are available is peace of mind. One time my wife was with me on a business trip to Europe and we took some personal days. At point she said “I can’t believe how relaxed you are over here.” Said I, “I am not driving.”
I don’t think there is a roadmap for how you work through grief. The hole left by Connie’s passing remains huge and I live it in every day. I think for me travel is going to be a way to get out of that hole over time. It doesn’t have to be fancy.
When I get back from Europe I am going to drive out to West Texas for a reunion of former Sierra Club national park volunteers. We will spend about 10 days in Big Bend National Park. Going and coming I will see some folks and some interesting places. But a trip doesn’t have to be that long. A couple of days camping, trips to see family.
I’ve sort of laid out an ideal year that will include a couple of Rick Steves tours and all the other sorts of trips I’ve mentioned. There is a big world out there and I think being in it is a form of grief therapy that will work for me.
So, looking ahead to packing the carry-on (yes I always have done overseas travel light without checking a bag – another topic for another day) and heading for the airport! My birthday present to me.
Rich Heiland is a retired journalist and semi-retired consultant, trainer and public speaker. During his journalism career he was a reporter, editor, publisher, college instructor, part of a Pulitzer Prize-winning team and a National Newspaper Association Columnist of the Year honoree. He lives in West Chester, PA and can be reached at [email protected].